"Zara, itna accha sama hai, hum Dono Itni Door Akele hai, paas aao na Zara, Hume tumhe apni bahoon mein bharne do aur beinteha pyaar barsane do", Zara could not stop her self, she was drowning in Kabeers eyes, in his words, in the emotions that were engulfing her, she was completely disoriented and was in another world with only Kabeer and her and none of the other problems, not the sharia board, not Ruksaar... Ruksaar, she was jolted back to reality the moment she thought of that name... she pushed him back, " No, kabeer, I can't" she moved away and turned her back towards him, " I just cannot bring myself to forget that we have another person linked to our lives and until that person is out of the picture nothing will be the same between us".
A tear escaped her eye and she turned around to face him, " But I will be giving her Talak as soon as she is out from her coma, you know that, don't you and I will be forever yours, so what's bothering you now Zara, why can't you just give in to the moment and forget everything else but us, why do you keep bringing her name up every time we come close? Why?"
"Because that's exactly where she is Kabeer, between us and until she is out of our lives I cannot bring myself to let go, I cannot completely be yours, I will never be able to lift up my head with pride and say to the world that this is my husband and I am the only woman in his life. Why can't you see this from my point of view?" cried Zara willing him to understand. And then she softly asked him, "do you remember when Miraaj tried to touch me, how mad you were, you were ready to kill him, put myself in your shoes, I have to live through seeing you married to another woman, almost going to bed with this woman and I have no clue when she would come out of her coma and if you will give her talak, you keep saying you married her to just save her life but now that she is safe how long will I have to wait to see her out of our lives, I can't move on without that happening, I can't just pretend that she is still not married to you, What if she insists you fulfill her conjugal rights, how can you refuse her, No Kabeer this has to stop and I cannot let you come close to me till this Ruksaar chapter is over."
" But Zara..." kabeer started to advocate his cause once again and Zara just raised her hand up asking him to stop and very quietly she asked him, "If You were in my shoes Kabeer, would you be able to touch me knowing that I am still married to another man, would you be able to pretend this other man does not exist, tell me would you, would you be able to ignore such an important truth and accept me as your wife?"
And then for the first time Kabeer actually saw what Zara was trying to show him all along, he saw what this had done to her, he saw her for what she was, a fiercely honest, loyal and a beautiful soul. He knew he was not worthy of her or her love, he knew he would have doubted Zara had she been in the same situation as him, he knew he would have not let her lay a finger on him, and he knew she was right and he knew what he had to do if he never wanted to lose her!
Everything was crystal clear to him now, he was ashamed of what he had put Zara through in the process of saving the life of an ungrateful person like Ruksaar, Ruksaar had to go and he was going to take care of this problem as soon as he got to Lucknow.
He turned to Zara, she was sitting on the chair, holding her head in her hands, weeping softly, he went down on his knees and held her hands together and promised her, "Zara, I will put an end to Ruksaars story once and for all and until I do that I will not force myself on you and will not come near you as a husband. I will always be there for you emotionally but physically we will be one only when Ruksaar is out of our lives for good!"
And for his own sanity and Zara's Kabeer knew what he had to do and the sooner he put an end to this farce of a marriage the sooner he could enjoy his life with his soul mate!
A tear escaped her eye and she turned around to face him, " But I will be giving her Talak as soon as she is out from her coma, you know that, don't you and I will be forever yours, so what's bothering you now Zara, why can't you just give in to the moment and forget everything else but us, why do you keep bringing her name up every time we come close? Why?"
"Because that's exactly where she is Kabeer, between us and until she is out of our lives I cannot bring myself to let go, I cannot completely be yours, I will never be able to lift up my head with pride and say to the world that this is my husband and I am the only woman in his life. Why can't you see this from my point of view?" cried Zara willing him to understand. And then she softly asked him, "do you remember when Miraaj tried to touch me, how mad you were, you were ready to kill him, put myself in your shoes, I have to live through seeing you married to another woman, almost going to bed with this woman and I have no clue when she would come out of her coma and if you will give her talak, you keep saying you married her to just save her life but now that she is safe how long will I have to wait to see her out of our lives, I can't move on without that happening, I can't just pretend that she is still not married to you, What if she insists you fulfill her conjugal rights, how can you refuse her, No Kabeer this has to stop and I cannot let you come close to me till this Ruksaar chapter is over."
" But Zara..." kabeer started to advocate his cause once again and Zara just raised her hand up asking him to stop and very quietly she asked him, "If You were in my shoes Kabeer, would you be able to touch me knowing that I am still married to another man, would you be able to pretend this other man does not exist, tell me would you, would you be able to ignore such an important truth and accept me as your wife?"
And then for the first time Kabeer actually saw what Zara was trying to show him all along, he saw what this had done to her, he saw her for what she was, a fiercely honest, loyal and a beautiful soul. He knew he was not worthy of her or her love, he knew he would have doubted Zara had she been in the same situation as him, he knew he would have not let her lay a finger on him, and he knew she was right and he knew what he had to do if he never wanted to lose her!
Everything was crystal clear to him now, he was ashamed of what he had put Zara through in the process of saving the life of an ungrateful person like Ruksaar, Ruksaar had to go and he was going to take care of this problem as soon as he got to Lucknow.
He turned to Zara, she was sitting on the chair, holding her head in her hands, weeping softly, he went down on his knees and held her hands together and promised her, "Zara, I will put an end to Ruksaars story once and for all and until I do that I will not force myself on you and will not come near you as a husband. I will always be there for you emotionally but physically we will be one only when Ruksaar is out of our lives for good!"
And for his own sanity and Zara's Kabeer knew what he had to do and the sooner he put an end to this farce of a marriage the sooner he could enjoy his life with his soul mate!
Writer: Ananhita
