AsYa OS: A Love So Unconditional! | Qubool Hai OS | Asad | Zoya

There goes a saying "paper is more patient than man", I never understood why the hell paper a non living thing was compared to a living man until that fateful day when I chose to write to him, yes it's a different thing that I never posted that letter! How patiently the paper bore all my emotions that I myself was unable to toggle with especially when he was marrying someone else right in front of my eyes! The best thing was that piece lived in my closet where no one can see it ever and he live in some secluded corner of my heart.

 I stood in front of him smiling widely and congratulated him for his future life with his wife! It hurt me so much, I envied his wife but strange it was that I wasn't jealous as not even a bad word came out of mouth, I can swear on my life for it if anyone asks because hell I was surprised on myself! He acknowledged my greetings with a friendly hug and how light I felt that moment! I still recall the day when he introduced me to his then love and now wife, it was more difficult for me then... it was so difficult but even in my miseries nobody helped me out of it! I was left alone he now had completely changed giving his love, undivided attention and me warning to not be so boisterous on the new addition to our group, he never understood nor did anyone except Humi got it that I was boisterous so not to be miserable all the time. I was reckless enough to not let myself stumble down in the deep furrows of depression, I know I played miserable comedy for almost every minute since then but I never grumbled nor did I lose my cue because I knew I shouldn't let that matter affect me so much. Finally now the battle is over. For heavens grace, I have won! I am independent both in mind and body. I don't need a shoulder anymore for all this conflict has made me strong and confident!   All tension evaporated with that hug and got extinguished from my body, I was relieved.. no not because I was in his arms, the place where I longed to be since the day my feelings changed, but because I was able to let him go and I was sure I would never see him like that anymore, though I won't deny the fact that he still will live in some nook or corner of my heart just as in my closet.. be unattended but he will, it will!

People meet, love blooms, heart breaks, shit happens but life still goes on! Well it still has too and it depends on us whether we chose to run away or stay back and I choose the later and to sore high! Heartbreak is not an end and as a result today I stand in front of Dilshad Constructions for the merger contract we have with the company, I was scheduled for a meeting at 10 in the morning with Mrs Sonal Kapoor the partner of Mr. Asad Ahmed Khan as we had been handed over the contract for the building security and some software projects.

I was on time, Sonal was a sweet and bubbly girl and we pretty got along well as acquaintances. She was impressed by my proposal and instantly gave me a nod and dialled to call someone, few minutes later a tall handsome figure with perfect face cut entered after knocking the door and too seat next to me!

"Asad, this is Zoya Farooqui the-"

"Aah I know Sona!" he shrugged off to avoid unnecessary waste of time, I guess!

"So Miss Farooqui, I guess you got a clean chit will be looking forward to work with you" he smiled, the smile that reached his eyes made me smile too.

"Hey, you both have dimples!" Sona exclaimed, that lady was really cute! What do I reply? I just smiled again!

There was absolute silence for next two minutes as we three got busy with the upcoming alliance until there was another knock at the door.

"Come in!" Sona said and her eyes grew a little big with love in no time she was at the door with her arms flung around that guy's shoulder kissing him like nobody else was in the room, I looked away uncomfortable at the PDA! I had a shy smile until I looked at Asad who looked miserable at the sight, his jaw had stiffened like a rock yet his lips broke into a smile contradicting his eyes, did I just imagine things? Or was he genuinely sad? But why was he sad? Anyways.. none of my business, right? But it was bothering me as if something in me knew what was he going through but I chose to ignore that something thinking it to be my foolish mind-made things!

"Asa- umm sorry Mr. Khan?" I started as we moved towards the elevator

"It's okay you can call me Asad!" he smiled

"Well okay, hmm are you fine?" I asked and his head snapped at me, did I ask something too much?

"Yeah, why?"

"You look drained!"

"Just due to work!" He looked everywhere except towards me

"No, not physically but emotionally!"

After saying it I realised I didn't watch my words before they leave my mouth, he didn't answer but stared at me blankly his eyes grew

*

As days went by I had really got to know that the two partners were gem of people and it was also added to my knowledge that both Asad and Sona were besties since childhood, later Aditya entered their circle and whisked away Sonal's heart and after the courtship of three years both got married and are happily married since two years. I didn't knew if it was only my eyes saw it but Asad's eyes were dimmed like he lost something, staying with them professionally for three months I had came to know that his little sister Najma had been married to Farhan three months back and two months before his ammi's death but those twin brown orbs were not just dimmed due to the loss of his ammi and sister there was a different story which the boundaries of professionalism didn't allow me to decipher, I certainly knew my limits!

There was something in his eyes that attracted me like an iron to a magnet, they were so deep yet so shallow, had happiness deep but something was amiss. I wanted to knew what because of this strange connection I had with him as I thought I knew what was he going through.. he felt so similar yet so different, so full of life yet so lonely just like me! But right now I feel like cursing that idiot. Why? Well I am so lost in knowing what's wrong with me and him that I have now forgotten to fuel my currently inactive Activa and am standing under some f*cking tree which is hardly saving me from getting drenched in heavy rains!

"Zoya?!" I heard someone from right

"What are you doing here?" I asked he was here!

"I just wanted to check if anything is wrong? You are okay, right?"

I know what's wrong with him, one word answer EVERYTHING! Do I look okay to him?! If I do well he need to report in a mental asylum right now, I can even offer him ride just he needs to fuel my vehicle first!

"Well, ummm yeah I guess, I will be fine once the rain stops!"

"You are sure?" Allah miya just kill this man!

"Hmm, yeah!" I said in a stiff voice, it looked clear that he didn't want to help me then what the hell he came to me in first place? Just bloody leave!

"Zoya-"

"How, I mean why did you come here?" I asked instead

"Well that's my house!" he said pointing out towards a bungalow in front of me, "I just saw you through my window and came to check, please come with me you are drenched!" he said calmly

"Hmm No it's actually fine, trust me once the rain gets over I will call someone with fuel and go my way!" I said

"Oh so your scooty ran out of fuel? Well then do come I will drop you once you dry yourself!" I wanted me to be more adamantly disagreeing but again that something made me follow him!

His house was huge too big for a single man the maids and workers were working as machines quietly without bothering each-other. There was hell of a silence and I was lost in the wide architecture and its fabulous interior.

"That's my sister's room, go and feel comfortable!"

"Thanks!" saying I went towards the direction he pointed.

I came out of the room after a nice one hour finally being able to dry my clothes with an electric iron and made my way towards the drawing room ardently searching for him.

"He rarely comes out of his room!" an age old woman spoke, astonishment of me visiting their house with him clearly visible on her face... I can even bet that my visit to KV created buzz across the whole working population there.

"I have to thank him for the help!"

"Should I call him?"

"No just beckon me the way to his room!" I smiled and the lady reciprocated leading to the upper floor of the mansion pointing to a certain room. I mumbled a thank you and went towards the room.

"Mr. Khan?" I knocked

"Zoya, Please Come!" I pushed the door, he was sipping his coffee.

"I hope I didn't disturb you, hell I am so sorry for all the inconvenience!"

"No need to be so formal! It's okay, we're friends! " he smiled, yet again his smile didn't reach his eyes. What was wrong with him?

"That's sweet of you, I just came to bid a goodbye and say thanks!" I smiled

"oh!"

"Goodbye Mr. Khan, I will see you in the office!"

"Have dinner with me!" he said to my utter shock as I turned to leave

"Ji?!"

"We all skipped lunch today due to the work, I am sure you haven't eaten anything since as well... you can join me on the dining table if you want.. I will ask the cook to prepare for two of us!" he stated

"It's okay Mr. Khan, there is actually no need of it! I don't want to trouble you anymore!" I said genuinely trying to avoid the uneasy feeling in my stomach.

"It's no trouble Zoya, please come with me!"

"Zhakir!" Asad called out as we reached the drawing room

"Sir, he is out to the market will be back after an hour!"

"Market? It's time for shopping huh?" Asad asked annoyed, looked like he skipped the dinner always or rather had it too late as there was no chance that AAK's employees would be careless.

"Can I cook?" I asked suddenly, I didn't wish to see him angry... his that avatar was horrible! Sona always kept ranting that he wasn't like this always but changed back few years, she had tried talking to him but in vain.. he would never respond and turned himself into a shell! I won't deny his smile made me smile, his anger made me cranky and his silly jokes had made me laugh... it wasn't typical but there was hell on connection between us and I just didn't wish him to be angry not atleast on my first visit to his mansion!

"Zoya, no it's-"

"It's actually okay! I can cook quite edible dishes!" I smiled and heard him giggle; I swear the older lady had her jaw dropped on the ground!

"No it's okay we do have a substitute cook!" he reasoned

"No Asad, it's okay can I see the kitchen?" I smiled

"This way!" The older lady took me off before Asad could agree or protest

*

I had managed to make French pasta stuffed with spinach and onion, Thai curry and salad! Zahira the elder lady and one another servant named Zubain helped me set the table before we started feasting on the food! I was hell hungry but had too control, it wasn't my house after all!

"I am so sorry Zoya , you had to-" he began

"You just some time before told me we are friends right?" I smiled

"It's tasty!" he said

"Thanks!" he showed me his dimpled smile as a: you are welcome gesture as I said that.

"You should smile often, it suits you!" I smiled and he popped his eyebrow at my compliment

"Uh Thanks! I never got a compliment for my smile in particular!" he scoffed a bit

"That's only because you rarely smile!" I said directly looking into his eyes; he looked startled but just for a while!   

"I do smile!" he protested

"Yeah you do but it hardly reaches your eyes!" I said as I put a spoon full of pasta in my mouth, he did not reply but stared blankly as if I had guessed one of his secrets! Getting no reply I continued, "I always see a void in your eyes Asad, and no that's not just b'coz you lost your ammi recently! That's different as if you wanted something but couldn't reach it in time... your eyes hide pain, desperation which you cannot get over. I don't know whether you were always like this but something in you is dimmed drastically!" I completed, unknowingly my palms squeezed his trying to comfort him as his eyes grew wide with shock as if collecting something then they bored into my eyes searching for answers. I detached my hands and his eyelids flickered at the loss of contact; did he wish me to hold his hands longer? Before I could reach him again he withdrew his hand and continued with the pasta!

*

Silence had engulfed the surrounding after my dialogue, I was no face reader but I knew I had read him correct. I wanted him to open up rather than bottling up all the pain. The car halted outside my house, I was about to get out but his next words froze.

"Everything I love goes away, I am destined to be alone Zoya!" I turned back to look at him he was looking at his lap, his eyes down, was he crying? "Abbu left us for another woman, I worked day and night to help my ammi, found an amazing friend in high school and fell in love as well.. I was at the peak of happiness when we finally started Dilshad Constructions. But once you are the top floor you have to take your way back downstairs too, right? " he laughed like mocking himself, "The very next week my ammi was diagnosed with breast cancer, it had reached irreparable stage!" he closed his eyes, "They say the world may leave you but your love won't, yes ofcourse I had Sona by my side always!" I froze again, he loved Sona!, "But she never ever loved me back in the way I did, she married and left with Adi... no I don't hate him!" he looked at me "I swear I would never, I never see her like I used to before but my heart aches somewhere Zoya! I swear I have no such feelings for her but still I envy Adi seeing the love he gets and I cannot have!" At that moment I realised why the void in Asad's eyes felt so familiar! "As if it was not enough ammi left me after some time and later Najma too got married. The big mansion threatens to eat me alive, Zoya! I am so alone! I don't know why me..." words refused to leave his mouth as he choked all I did is wrapped him in my arms and cried bitterly, all those images of my past flashed before my eyes... I didn't know whether I was comforting him or trying to find comfort myself! After what felt like eternity he detangled himself.

"I am sor-" before he could complete I placed my index finger on his lips and then kissed his forehead reassuringly. He gave me a faint smile and drove back; it didn't reach his eyes yet again but it still seemed different!

*

Days passed by as if flipping pages! Asad had unknowingly become dearer too me, surprisingly he wasn't awkward around me as I had thought he would be after that night... I didn't give any fake assurance to my heart this time though it flattered when he was in close proximity unknowingly, because I knew we were going to part ways sooner or later after the project gets over. He was supposed to move to USA near his sister and set up his life there. Though we grew much closer I knew whatever we talk none of us are going to stay in touch with each-other, Can you understand why? Well I cannot explain it exactly but I just won't be able to and neither would he! The day that I would be legally done with DC had finally arrived; I was in the office to collect my last payment! I had decided not to see him as it would just turn me weak as he was leaving the next day to US!

"Zoya!" I halted in my tracks as I heard him as I was about to go to the main road to hire a taxi

"Hey!" this is all I could manage

"Leaving without seeing me?"

"No, actually I thought you must be busy with your last day arrangements!"  I smiled trying hard it look real

"It's done!" he smiled too

"Asad what's wrong? You look happy but that's dimmed again there!" I again squeezed his hands pointing at his eyes; he looked startled again as if I had guessed his secret like I did that night!

"Umm-" he couldn't speak

"Listen to me carefully Asad, your life is yours.. its upon you how you live it whether you keep crying on your past or make an insight for your future! You are going away from here leave the miseries here and take good memories back they will aid you in creating many more there... I am sure!" I smiled

"Thanks!" he smiled too

"No need Mr. Khan!" I smiled narrowing my eyes as if accusing him for saying formal words to his friend he giggled and then suddenly stopped staring  at me blankly as I took a step closer, "Asad I never did you a favour... I did it because" I took a deep breath, "Because I have developed a soft corner for you in my heart!" I pressed his palms for a second again and then turned around to get a taxi, I didn't look back maybe because I knew his gaze was piercing my souls, my resolve would have gone into ashes if I would have seen him especially after my confession. I straight went to get a taxi and left. He was looking forward for his new life I just cannot stop him from perceiving what his insight had framed for him. I couldn't and I wouldn't...

THE END

Writer : FleurdeLice