The silver illumination from the sky above only enhanced the serenity of the night. The moon's reflection fell on the cool water of the swimming pool. The temperature was oddly low, and the cold breeze only announced the early coming of winter.
As Aman took the last few lapse from the other end of the indoor swimming pool, his entire body began to get numb from the cold water. Did it bother him? Nope! Not a bit. Because his heart was in a much worse state. His heart felt heavy from the guilt that dripped from every inch of his body. It felt like someone had drawn a hole before ripping it apart.
It had been 3 months since he had gotten to know about roshni's innocence. Three months since Roshni rescued him by taking those arrows. 3 months since she confessed her love to him as she lay lifeless in his arms. And three months since he had felt the most helpless person in the whole wide world.
Only he knew what he went through when Roshni just twirled him out of the blue and stood at the receiving end of those sharp arrows that injected through her skin into the muscle and bone. It felt as though someone had ripped his skin apart and shot those arrows in his own heart. His hands were dripped in her blood as blood kept oozing out of her back.
Wiping away the water droplets with a towel, Amal started drying his hair as he quietly entered the room, making sure not to make a sound. His heart melted at the scene in front of him. With her arms and legs in all directions, there she laid hogging the entire bed. Her mouth was slightly open as he heard her calm rhythmic breathing.
Aman left out a soft chuckled as he closed the French door. "such a baby", said Aman shaking his head. But his facial expression changed the e next second as he felt the blow of guilt yet once again. How could he? How could he not see through the heart of this woman. How could he doubt her after everything that she did for him and his family.
Pulling over a t shirt, he set the alarm for 7 on his phone. As he turned around, he heard the soft snores and contemplated whether he should move her to the other side to make some space for him or just sleep on the couch. After five minutes, he decided to go with the latter. As he grabbed his pillow and the comforter, he felt a tug st his wrist.
"if you're done contemplating, you can slip in beside me"
As he looked at her incredulously, Roshni turned around and smiled with her eyes still closed.
"and you can stop staring"
"Roshni?! I thought you were asleep?"
Rolling her eyes, she looked at him with his eyebrows raised. I mean it had been three months with the same pattern. He would wake up in the middle of the night and take a few lapse in the swimming pool just to calm his mind down. Roshni would pretend to be asleep because she wsnted to give him space and time to gather and process his thoughts. She knew the guilt he felt wouldn't go away so easily. But today she decided to talk. Because it has been three months since he properly slept. She could clearly see the dark circles under his eyes, those creases that felt like had made a permanent space on his forehead, and the exhaustion that was so prominent on his face and body. Her heart sank every single night when she felt him moving out of the bed.
Roshni extended her hand to him with an unknown longing and pain in her eyes. Little did Aman know that the pain he saw in her eyes was for him.
Putting his hands in hers, he quickly sat beside her, a sudden panic engulfing him, "what's wrong? Aap thik Hai? Are you feeling sick? Why do you look so pale?"
Huffing, Roshni chuckled, "Allah knows best khan Baba, you talk too much"
"Roshni", Aman said In A Warning tone.
"okay okay."
As he stared at her with the same stern look, she realized he was still waiting for an answer. "it's nothing. I'm on my period, so probably that's why"
Sighing in relief, quickly got off the bed, "ill be back, stay put"
Before Roshni could say anything, he was out of the room. And within no time, he came back with a glass in his hand.
"lukewarm honey water. Have it"
Aman held the glass in front of her As Roshni stared at him in disbelief. When she didn't move or take the glass l, he held it near her lips.
Pushing it away, Roshni spoke,"Allah knows best khan Baba, you have some manufacturing defect "
"Roshni", he warned her sternly
"aur nahi to kya. Did I say I'm feeling sick? This is the height to being overprotective"
When he stared at her with a look that clearly said he's not budging until she finishes the liquid in the glass, she snatched the glass from his hand and drank it in one go.
Putting away the glass, he turned the lights off and slipped under the blanket. Moving closer, roshni put her head on his chest, wrapping her arms around his waist as if it was the most natural thing to do. She knew Aman hardly ever showed his feelings. He was one of the most reserved men she had ever come across to. But for the past three months, it felt like he was trying to distance himself from her. Being reserved naturally is something, and pretending to be reserved because of some guilt that's holding him back to show his true feelings is an entirely different thing. And Roshni wouldn't let her khan Baba drift away from her like that... Not even in th e worst Nightmare.
Roshni's sudden move took him by surprise. His hands laid on his side. He didn't have the heart to hold her back. He didn't deserve this angel. He was a beast. His past actions nothing but screams that.
"Aman?" , roshni whispered with an unknown longing in her voice.
Aman.
it was the first time she had called him by his name and his name never sounded more beautiful. He could listen to her all day, all night l, calling him out by his name.
"hmm?"
"it's high time you let go"
It didn't take long for him to understand what she was talking about. She never talked about this in these three months but Aman knew very well that nothing escapes roshni's eyes...at least if it's about him. She has this unknown "connection" with him through which she can analyse any distress going on within him.
His eyes blurred as a drop of tear escaped the corner of his left eye. Sighing, he closed his eyes as he wrapped her in his arms, as if to gain strength... As though to hide this angel inside his skin for him to protect her from every wrath, and every evil eye that ever existed.
"I don't know how to. It's... It's hard"
Snuggling into him, she drew soothing circles over his chest, as though to cure the hole in his heart.
"I have forgiven you a long time ago. Why can't you then?"
Inhaling the scent of her trademark berry vanilla shampoo, he buried his face over her head as he softly whispered, "I'm sorry. I'm SO sorry!"
It felt like her heart just took a sudden dive into her stomach. The agony that dripped from his one "sorry" ripped her into shreds. The only thing she wished at that moment was having some superpower to take every last guilt, and agony from him and fill him with the happiness of a lifetime.
Raising her head, she looked at him as her hand cupped his face, "shh... It's okay. We will talk about this tomorrow. You need to sleep. And by sleep, I mean sleep sleep. I'm turning off your alarm for 7am. You're not going to office today."
"I have back to back meetings tomorrow Roshni. I have to-"
"and I'm sure those meetings are not more important than your health. I have talked to Khanna. He has already postponed them to day after tomorrow."
"woah lady...when..I mean... How? What?"
He stared at her in disbelief.
"Allah knows best khan Baba, aap KO kya lagta Hai, Ki sorf aap hi humpe hukum chala sakte Hai. Mein nahi?", said Rosh I rhetorically, her chin held up in pride.
He noticed how she switched back to khan Baba again. And for some reason, it bothered him more than those meetings.
" but-"
"uhoh! time up. no more questions."
Sighing, he shook his head. Only Roshni...
"fine, I will only listen to you in one condition", said Aman junaid khan. No one can beat him when it comes to making deals.
"shoot."
"you are not allowed to call me khan Baba from today. It's Aman for you"
Roshni stared at him incredulously. For some reason, she felt as though her heart skipped a beat. She felt her her heart doing a dance in triumph. She didn't know why though. It was just a name. He just wants her to call him by his name. Why such over enthusiasm.
But she knew why. This was the first time in these three months he had asked her to do something with full right.
A right of a husband.
It was a small step towards her mission of getting him back to normal. It was small but significant. and she wanted to celebrate.
"Done deal."
Aman smirked at her as she gave him a tooth smile. She looked like a baby who just got her favorite chocolate.
He saw her come forward and cup his face once again as her lips pecked his nose and then cheek before she whispered, "I love you Aman"
His eyes blurred yet once again and his throat felt dry. He gulped and wet his lips with his tongue. What did he ever do to deserve this angel?
As she snuggled back to him, with her head on his chest and her arms around his waist, she didn't long for him to say the same to her. She knew it will take time. And she's ready to wait. For now, her primary goal is to take away the guilt. Because she knew he didn't deserve it. And she would not let him become distant from her, neither will she let him drift away from her.
But as they say, you are pleasantly surprised the most when you expect the least. In no time, he engulfed her in his warm embrace before she felt his lips touching her forehead in a long kiss.
It was a kiss of apology, cure and promise. Apology for every brutal behavior, every wrong he had ever done to her. A kiss to cure the pain he had cause her. And a kiss of promise to take away all her pain, and distress that remained, and fill her with all the happiness that he could ever get for her and beyond!
"Sleep. ", whispered Aman as he buried his face into her hair.
And for the first time in three months, Roshni saw a ray of hope. May be... May be it wouldn't be too long before life gets back to normal.
Writer : Mushfika
