The air was cold but his heart was still filled with thoughts. This marble mansion of his was one place he didn't share with anyone. No one, not even Ruqaiya, could enter without his permission. It was a multi storied small mansion which was between Diwan-e-Khaas and his own private apartment. Whenever he wanted to be alone, he would come here. It was his most favorite place in the whole fort of Agra. He had always come here to be in his own thoughts. It was a place he seemed unreachable to anyone. The mansion had three level. The stairs were a little narrow. The lower level had a common area for private meeting that couldn't be heard by anyone. The middle level had a small study. A jharokha showed the map of hindustan from the roof to the floor. After every victory of his, the borders of it were painted in green. Agra was marked with a red stone. There were several other scrolls in the room. It was like his private store room. His hawk like eyes could seen anything missing from this place. The top level had an open place with pillars and a throne sitting there. He could see the entire fortress from there.
"Tell Jodha Begum that I am looking for her." The maid bowed and left to carry out the order. He was i his study and watched the river from the balcony of the mansion. The pillars made the marked the boundary of the room and balcony. From roof to the floor, there was a jharokha for walls with leaving one side for doors. There was a table, a chair, shelves with scrolls and several shelves with small boxes holding possession that he would never ever give anyone. There was a hammock outside in the balcony. He could see the sky from the position of the hammock.
When the queen entered, she saw her husband sitting on a chair with his feet on the table. He was studying a scroll. She was curious as to what he was studying. It couldn't be something written because he couldn't read.
"Shehenshah?" She asked. He would've of course heard the sound of her anklets.
"Jodha Begum, I have something important to tell you." He said. He threw the scroll on the table.
"Put your feet off the table for starters. There are papers on the table. It is an insult to the books." She said. He chuckled.
"Well, it had long ago left me behind. What is the difference to man who can't read. Anyway, I didn't call you here so you could taunt me over my illiteracy. I have a small problem and was hoping you could solve it." He said.
He didn't know how to say it. Abdul had laughed at him like he was cracking funniest joke when he had asked his best friend to help him with this. He finally looked up at her. He had always found the river side scenery to be beautiful. Yet, the river of Yamuna couldn't compare to the beauty of his queen in front of him. She had finished her bath, a bit of her hair still wet from the bath. The incense smell coming from her indicated that she had finished her evening prayers.
She laughed. "Such a haughty Emperor had suddenly today decided he wants help from this silly begum of his." She muttered but Jalal heard it clearly. This woman would know how to ruin everything.
She looked around the place. It was beautiful. She had been here for ten months but she had never come to this mansion of his. Of course, she knew it was his private mansion. Though she didn't understand the point because his own Khaas Mahal was private enough. The jharokhas were so beautiful. She could imagine that a child self of hers would have found this place perfect for hide and seek. She saw a toy elephant on the shelf. She picked it up to see it.
"Put it down, Jodha. You shouldn't touch what isn't yours." Jalal told her softly. He was still trying to gather his thoughts which went flying out of the window like a kite that had been cut from the string. He had once commission a kite with a some gold decorations on it. He had decided to fly it, after all it was a kite and was meant to be flying, against the suggestion of his Jiji Ammi who had found it foolish that he wanted gold decorations on a kite. The kite cut off from the thread and he lost it. He still remembers the look his Jiji Ammi gave. After four years of that incident, Jodha had somehow found that kite and called it her possession now. She refused to give it back to him.
Jodha put the elephant back and showed her empty hands and rolled her eyes at him.
"I want my kite." He said.
"That isn't yours anymore. I found it and I'll keep it." She replied adamant.
"It is my property." He argued.
"If I am supposed to believe your so called real story, then you lost it four years ago. I found it and it is mine now. You probably didn't have people look for it near the water gate. I found it there and took it." She answered calmly.
"That is mine. I don't like giving things that are mine." He tried to sound angry. She was unfazed by it.
"Is that what you called me here for? Then let me see around the palace as we continue this yes and no argument." She said. How was she here in his special place and ordering him?
She saw an anklet hanging from the corner of a box. She recognized the anklet. It was the one she lost in Amer.
"That is my anklet." She complained in accusation towards him. He grinned.
"No. You lost it and I found it." He replied. "It is mine now."
"Oh really? What are you going to do with an anklet?" She asked, her arms crossed on her chest. For someone who was 20 year old, she was quite childish at times.
"Put that back or I might push you off the balcony." He tried to sound serious. She laughed at him.
"I amuse you too much for you to do that." She said. He hated how she could easily push away his threats but maybe he liked that about her too.
She was dressed in white and blue skirt with golden borders. Her blouse was white with gold embroidery on it. The dupatta was plain white with gold borders. Instead of styling it how she regularly did, she just simply draped it around her. She was probably in the Angoori Bagh of his private quarters noting how see was unfazed that she didn't follow the regular style of putting her dupatta. She had a habit of being at ease laying down in the grape garden of his. While his others wifes loved being inside his chambers, she relished the garden more than his chamber.
"We'll solve this more politically. You give me my anklet and I will give you your kite." She proposed a deal.
"How about I keep both." He said.
"Then you can forget about the kite. I have many anklets. Like this is the last pair of anklets in this world." She flipped her hair and huffed.
The sun was setting down and the golden rays of the sun fell on her. He couldn't have imagined an angel looking like anything other than this rajput princess in front of him. The angel could go from being the delicate soft rose to being a wild cat growling.
She saw the orangish hue over the river. The sun was on the opposite side but still the sky looked so aesthetic over the river. Light pink over the orange and the soft sunlight slowly kissing before it could bid a farewell for the night.
She looked so golden while the light flashed on her. From where Jalal stood, he could see the sunlight on one side of her and on the opposite side, the river.
"Allah.." He exclaimed in the beauty of the scene before him. As the light came through the jharokha which was carved to show hindustan, Jodha stood right where Agra was in the shadow. When Jalal looked at it, it seemed so symbolic to him. He had always called Agra as his own heart and she was standing right over his heart but was completely oblivious to it.
"Jalal, when you fall in love, you have no control over your heart anymore. You have simply surrendered it to the person for them to do as they please with it. Whether they treasure it or break it. Love takes you to a place no one can. It is like a glimpse of what heaven looks like. You're a boy who can't deal with a defeat but trust me when you find someone you love, nothing would make you more happier than letting yourself surrender to her. When you find her, be sure that you tell her. No time could be better than telling her at that moment."
His father's words came to his mine. Even though he wasn't the best Emperor in his family history but he was a man who was wise. Jalal took a deep breath. It now or never.
"Jodha.." He called her. She looked at him. He stopped momentarily. Fear in his heart. What if she says that he was stupid to do that? Allah knew that his ego was fragile.
"Jalal, you were scared before jumping down the waterfall but did it stop you? Then don't stop now. That was jumping off a waterfall for a stupid bet and this is easy as saying I love you." His heart told him.
"I guess this is something I wanted to say for a long time. Don't interrupt me or I'll forget." He told her.
"Okay.." She said. She was confused. What could make him nervous?
"I never had time to be a teenager. I was thirteen when I had sat on the throne. I had just entered my teen years and I was entrusted with the weight of the sultanate. As such I had never been like other boys around my age even as a prince. I have quite a bit of pride to accept that things would go out of my way and that somewhere I was panicking." He said and gave her a red rose. "Guess, the regular norms of young boys confessing they like someone is giving them a rose. So this is the rose I should have had the courage to give you when I first saw you."
She took it slowly but was about to say something when he gave another yellow rose.
"The normal way of starting a marriage that had been bound on the basis of love is trying to be friends. So this the rose, I was supposed to give you when we had ended up being married to each other." He said.
He then gave her a pink rose.
"This is for the time you had done things in my name which didn't catch my eye. I never knew how the my people had been troubling the orphanage kids because they couldn't pay the market tax but the only hope for them to live through without any support was earning by selling handmade things. You had sent out an order on my name that I had allowed them personally conduct their business and wouldn't have to worry about paying the market taxes until they were earning profitably enough to pay taxes. A thanks and an admiration for being someone who would worry about my people like I would."
He finally gave her a pair of seven red roses put together in a ring.
"When I was 9 years old, my father gave me this ring. It had belonged to his mother. My grandfather gave it to her when he married her. My father told me that although he had several other wives, his mother was closest to his heart. The two were always together. She lived all her life since she married him to be his companion rather than his queen. He gave it to me because he always thought that he saw his own father's reflection in me." He said.
"Shehenshah.." She was unsure if he was saying what she was assuming.
"I never realized myself when I fell in love with you. Somehow, somewhere, you have become quite important to me. I smile when I see you. I straighten up my act and behave like I am a good guy when you start walking around the garden while I deal with petty thieves. I never bothered where my spend my night or my days but it is like your eyes call me to relax for once. I just wonder at times how would my name sound when you say it. I don't know how you suddenly had become so important to me. I was not someone to play around in rains. It always sounds childish to me but then I don't where the thought goes when I see you playing in the rain with the peacocks in my garden. I didn't even know if I really had a heart. I never cried when my father died. Not even a single drop of tears. Everyone was confused why I didn't act like the kids normally do when their parents died. I had begun to callmyself heartless since that day but when you were dying of the poisonous dart that was meant for me but you pushed me away and took it on yourself, I had lost my mind. I had gone mad. The man had died but couldn't stop punching him because the hakim had declared that no anti poison he was giving worked on you." He said. He smiled at her, walked out of the room and sat on the hammock "I don't know what you're going to think of this but if I didn't say it today, I would give up on actually wanting to confess it because I would get back to being the boy who is scared of defeat. I am leaving the ring to you. Whether you want to keep it or leave it here, it is up to you."
He didn't look at her in fear of not being able to take her rejection. He had heard her telling Ammijaan that she didn't feel anything for him the morning after he had spent a night with her and he had gone crazy. He took several breathes to calm himself and not react badly. She came out of the room and stood before him.
"The morning in the your garden, I didn't kiss you because I wanted to show that some begum that I was your wife but it was because I was finally comfortable with accepting that you were someone I had ended up falling in love with and I had accepted that maybe you didn't love me. I could deal with that the whole while that you had been spending time with some other girl. That night, one of the maids told me about how her story was. She was so fine with her being in love with her husband while he loved someone else. I couldn't understand it. How can any girl bear that her husband doesn't love her or is with someone else. She told me that, it is knowing that there will always be someone who will endlessly love him. It is knowing that no matter what, all you want is for them to be happy. He would always have her who truly loves him and would always do so." She said. He looked up and saw her soft smile. "I would consider that my love is accepted if you smile at me and say that you're glad that I was still there for you."
"You love me?" He asked. That was unexpected. How did he not know? He had always assumed he could very easily notice if someone was in love with him. How difficult is it to notice someone is in love?
She pushed him back on the hammock to lay down and make space for her. She settled comfortably and used his arms as a pillow. He was still a little surprised at that.
"You're surprised now but in the morning you'll go around parading and saying of course it would be impossible for someone not to fall in love with you." She said with a smile. She gave a grin similar to his and in a tone mocking his own, "Have you seen me, Abdul. Tell me if there is a girl in this place who wouldn't fall for this handsome face and the great magnetic charm that my personality is."
He laughed at that. She definitely knew him well. He looked at her. She was looking at the stars as she played with her hair. She held the roses he gave her and smelled them. She looked at the ring. "You know, when Maasa came here, she was telling me that Baapusa had actually met your father."
"I know.. Your uncle, Kunwar Sujamal's father had helped my father when he was being attacked. Chaghtai Khan had told me of that. That was when my father met yours." He replied.
"Ammijaan told me Maasa that somewhere he knew that somehow they were going to be more related." She said.
"That is all Ammijaan makes up. My father did definitely call himself an astrologer and somewhere he had predicted that I was going to bring glory to the TImurlane but this inclination Ammijaan speaks of would be a whole bunch of crap." He said.
"That is your mother. Mind how you speak of her." She told him. He chuckled.
"Rest assured, Begum, I have immense respect for my mother and but now claiming that my father always knew that you and I would marry before I was even born is a loud claim. Even for Ammijaan." He said. "She always likes praising my father."
"Why shouldn't she? It is her husband and then again he is actually someone to praise. Unlike you, he has always been nice and quite softer. He was more a man of heart. I have only heard about him and already have great impression of him. She has lived with him. He was a humble man. I'm pretty sure he was the sweetest person I would've met. I mean, now I seriously think someone must have misplaced you at birth. You couldn't possibly have been born out of two people so lovely." She said. Jalal huffed.
"You don't know how nice I am." He claimed. She laughed.
"Sure.. I have seen you terrorize a poor man who was begging for mercy." She said. "That is how nice you are."
"In my defense, that man had beaten down a poor farmer and taken all his wealth even after the poor farmer had paid back the loan with interest." He defended himself.
"What about how you had actually grabbed a man throat all because he just speaking to me." She asked.
"You are naive. You didn't see how the man was looking at you. I had seen it." He claimed. She chuckled.
"You dream too much. I'm not some heaven's angel that everyone will fall in love with me. That man was already married." She said.
"I was already married when I saw you. Did that matter?" He argued.
It went on through the night. Silly bantering and teasing each other. The two had not realized when they fell asleep on the hammock in the balcony.
Writer: Ali Chase
